Sunday, January 02, 2005

Happy New Year 2005

Haha! Finally, I have grown up officially. No more can I enjoy student benefits. Hai~~. But, hey I am officially a grown-up. :) !!!! Anyway, 2dae new year, remember my resolution. And I am looking for inspiration, to think of questions for the Challenge book. Got to be financially independent as fast as possible. Feel realli bad always, getting money from my parents, when I think I can earn money at my age. And, if I am rich and affluent, not only can I provide for my family (and my future one, haha), but also to donate money to charity to do good deeds.

2dae, new year, yet do not have any activity that is worth even to mentioning. But, I go to my uncle's house for the new year celebration, cum the maid's birthday. Afterthat, come back and input this diary. Realise this time, that I am going to N.S very soon. Still pondering whether is it realli appropriate to have (if i can); or want to have (if i cannot) a girlfriend. Realise my one especially for 2 years, (REalli hope can last for lifetime). For me I am looking for LAST, NOT LUST. But I was immensely jerky. Always need 2 yrs to catch up. Must accelerate this.. :) . Anyway, have to keep things natural, only then can happiness be found. Rush things, end up exploding the balloon. Yet too slow, the balloon will not be expanding at the right size, and worst, other ppl will take over your place to blow the balloon, and you have to regret. So, it is imperative I have to keep things balance. If I have the means, and after finding out the Ways and the Truth about Balance, I will promote Balance as the harmonious philosophy.

Always use to be very sadden by my appearance, like pimples or whatever,, or why Heaven did not give me a good face or wat (which is totally crap, in fact, I am blessed with good physique or else why will Xuan de want to be me ... [Heehee]). Just realise, god (to me lady luck and probability) only smile, bless, look after, and follow those ppl who are sincere, who are benevolent, who take care of themselves. This is why, I must be confident (of course not so confident and become arrogant [This is stupid]). Haha. Moreover, after so many years, realise looks are very very deceptive. They do not last, even if you use desperate measures like operation or botox. But, appearance do matter, since I live in this society, and the golden rule is to follow some rules although they may be so stupid that I do want to adhere it in the 1st place. Anyway, I feel good, and that there is always uniqueness in me, and my idiosyncrasies. Hah. Feel confident. But if any1 think I am arrogant, pls correct me.

Anyway, remember, change is inevitable. Most important, we must change for the good, up the hill and definitely not down the slope. It is of utmost momentousness to remember a saying: If we do not change, we will die like a dinosaur. If we change too much, we will become radicle, always so unstable and dangerous. So, balance, though balance itself can be subjective.

I myself have read up a story. That's this A person meets this B person. For 2 times in "introduction programme". But this A, for the 1st time meet B, already like B, and knoe that B is the right person for him. But, this A dun knoe why, is still a small little innocent young kid, and a jerk. Always like to tao people. So when B actually say hello to this A, this A somehow dun knoe why he did not respond. B misunderstand or nonchalant or whatever, and thus never talk to A, and they become strangers (though they knoe each other). But strangely, they have many things in common. This A realise he has been dao, but realise that he has never means to tao B. Becos, B is hahah, has some special height, so when B waves, A did not see and pay for it. As A himself has also some special height. Hah. So for the next 2 years, A has to pin for B. And soon news spread around. A understand that for this 2 years, B will realli want to study. Haha. So he did not do anything. He instead vow to be a better man for his 2004 New year resolution. He has indeed become (Judge from himself, but ... hah) better, even for a smidgen of it. As B is really so "unique", naturally B will have other admirers. A has even some friends from these admirers so has to feel exasperated. But life goes on. A keeps thing under wraps, so as to make sure that B's reputation will not be tarnished. However A is hum, so ... Haha. So, come the annual "Gathering for food". A still did not make the iniative. And he pays for it. Anyway, A thought B got a date. Hah. But B did not have anyway. Moreover A got very important things to do the next day. But A is till hum. He come to his realisation, knoe that hum will never bring him far. It is important to be slightly thick-skinned at times. Hai~~ for him. Finally due to some fate, A manage talk to B again. Haha. But, A still have not much progress with B, but can only say cool and steady wins the game.

Looking at "this story", I have learnt a lot. In fact, cool and steady wins the game, I learnt this but must not abuse. In fact, it should be, only when u realli want to drive the ship, then when the ship reach the harbour, it will go straight. In fact, I hope that that A will continue to be a better man, has his prospect great.

Great! Life goes on, let's hope I can make full use of it! Hah. Arigo Para Slempre, my friends, my blog.

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