Always look on the bright side of life ... tuttutututututu

Always look on the bright side of life, and most things will be fine. Well, I have served the people for around 1 month already. To be frank, I am really exposed to the real Singapore. I mean though I am a NS, but I work like a regular. Or even harder than some. Of course, when answering to the superior, the regulars will have to answer more.

Nonetheless, I am also quite fearful of what I am inputting might affect the OSA which I swore for the rest of my life. This is why I am limiting myself for writing out most of the cases I have attended.

But, sometimes being a frontline people, that faces the public, we have tremendous pressure when things happen. When you do things harder, the public will complain against you for being too harsh without discern effort. When you try not to do things the hard way, the public will still complain you for being slack. It seems I have gone back into a contradictory cycle, that is whatever I do, it seems that I am always wrong. This is life. Like what my Sir said to me, whatever you do, as long as you do it with a conscience, and all your actions are justifiable, then you do not fear and do what you deem. Sometimes public only see the back side and not the front, thus they will never know and heap abuses to you.

This made me notice that not only the police but many things have changed from the past. Though I am a newcomer and seem not to be in a position to comment, I have the disgression to see things. Last time, many civil servants command respect, but now it seems all of us have become a slave instead of servants. The respect we gain, which I like to joke from the symbol I have created from my 5 fingers, seems to turn into the 3rd finger now sticking out of people's hands. I am not commenting anything about the management or what, and I am NS and I don't even bother about the whole system and just want to serve the 2 years to repay the country. But most of the time, the regulars will be the one to suffer. Unlike the big shots, normally the older people and the lower education qualification face many injustice.

Alas, I do not even know about the whole things of SciFi. Am I destined to succeed, or I will become a reject. Everyone holds the destiny in their hands. I have grown to be more mature, as I realise I am more mature than what I think of myself. When I look at some of the childlish actions of the regulars though they are at least 5 years older than me, I shake my head and come to a sudden realisation that I am quite mature. For the professionalism, well I am still learning. Just keep swimming.

In fact for the last 18 years, I am glad to meet many people, friends whom I learnt from. In my secondary school, I managed to enter the best class, with high academics, many foreigners and many good characteristics and also many high-flyers. That class I know many of us will become very successful in life. For my primary school, I get surprise and sadness too.

It seems people change but sometimes they change too fast, or they change the wrong way. Hai~~~ But, anyway I hope for the best for all I have met. Secondary school is my turning point, JC is my differentiation, NS will be my gradient and uni will be differentiation, and in life the conclusion and reusing what I learnt, Integration in my life. A subtle Mathematician will not understand what I meant.

For the stupid things I have written in my blog, I decide not to delete them, for the sake of reminiscence and reflection that I will never be like this in the future. So forgive me, for those people implicated into the mess of words I have created.

A mere reflection, ....., May the force be with me ..... (I still have not watch due to overwhelming crowds Damn .....)

Bye Blog, as thou shall treat you as my friend, though a non-living but with the intricate spirits ...

Btw, add 3 new sections:

Thou shall endure smoking (From my friends), but will never purchase, trade or use or consume the cigarettes or cigars no matter what happens ... Thou will try to elude the smoke whenever possible to prevent myself from becoming a hardcore smoker ...

Thou shall belittle drugs, condemn any form of illegal and harmful drugs which was abused by any people, and will never purchase, trade or consume any forms of illegal and detrimental drugs ....

Thou shall only allow a small portion of alcohol, to be drank, at an acceptable level where thou will not lose my conscience and humane and will not pose any dangers to me and others .... Purchase of alcohol beverages thou shall comply legally ...

Thou can gamble but never to an extent of using my surplus or savings, never to reach more than 5 % of my earnings and savings, and never to burrow any single cents for gambling ...

(My personal that is subjective: I will never buy 4D or Toto or Soccer bets or something like this sorts including the lottery tiackets for myself. For others, It will be flexible. This will be consider gamblings. For stock markets, it will be my disgression but to ensure that I will not invest blindly and indiscriminately and ensuring my surplus is ensured)

Gambling to me means allowing stakes especially of monetary values to be used as ante for gaming, that includes casino games to lottery. Shares will be excluded from this term, but is carefully monitored.

[Writing this "law" for myself will ensure that I can behave myself and not let myself loose. Of course, I cannot possibly punish myself, but to treat myself as robots and to follow this "programs". Plus the casino is coming and I am exposing to a lot of craps, thus I have to be careful, face it correctly and tactfully while I cannot elude the craps in my life ...]

Me, myself and my life ...

I do not know why. At least for every single stage of life, I am going to make a person hate me. Why? Is it really about me? About my problems. About my negative character. Why do I not think of the repercussion? Why do I not think properly before I make things open and public? If I did not stop this insane action, I am going to end up hurting more friends and myself than ever. Why? Now I must really be sure that the person will acknowledge me before I can see that I can give comments. And also, I must really be sure I know the people. hai!! What is pride? What is ego? There are just a passing dream. 18 years later, and a new hero is bornt. I made many people misunderstand me. My intention. Make scathing remarks. Hahah!!! I am now waiting for the retribution. Do not know why? After every mistakes I made, I am bound to meet with retribution. Better to accept the retribution by myself on Earth now, than to carry it to my graves or to perturb my friends and family. I am a person who firmly believe that, I work for the people, and not the other way round - the people work for me.

Shocking and astounding, disturbing and very real. Everything I think of, to make myself positive, a long long way to go. It is a total setback to my path of mature and enlightenment. How can I ever be so childish, stupid to make sacarstic remark on impulse on a friend or at least an acquaintance. Darn it. Hai~~ Anyway, all is over and I hope everything is in order. Hopefully she and her friend will never get to meet a jerk like me. Never in their lives.

And I should stop acting like a jerk.

I realise that this blog thing is very open. So open that it is scary. The whole world can see my thoughts. Even thoughts that are sensitive enough. Perhaps it is my mistake to make diaryisblog things. Diary should have a limitation of secrecy. But too bad, only the blog can provide me with good computerised effect. If only, I can limit some people watching my blog. Think there are these systems already, but need to pay money....

The only good things and afterthoughts I can see in the whole "myjerk" incident and the openess of the blog is that I have managed to clear a fateful misunderstanding though at an expense of not only one but many friendships, sadly. But also, I am roused, woke up and horrified to this scary personality of mine. I am going to imprison that in the permanment jail in my brain. The good or don't know bad thing is if I have kept quiet, at least people will have good impression of me. But when I open my mouth, all things went loose. I think I will rather let the people view me as the real person. I hate hypocrisy but still want people to view me as a good-will person, not a jerk.

An unexpected sudden realisation but all was real, true, bona fide. Hai~~ Some mistakes cannot be afford to be done. To minimise this, I have to gain insights from other people's mistakes so that I do not need to do their mistakes and end up losing something to learn something.

Hai!!! May goodness be upon me. May the force be with me. May the dark side of me be sealed forever.

This "myjerk" incident also shows me that sometimes only immediate and suitable openess can clear all airs. If the "bad air" is stored too much, then it will eventually explode. This is why airs, good or bad must be cleared off periodically and systematically and tactfully. Or else all will be lost and all will remain damp, and I will be poignant and regretful. I promise myself I will not be like this, but hai!!! the inevitable.

Anyway, Vesak day coming. Wish all the Buddhists or even the world a Happy Vesak Day!!! To me all the festivals in the world may seem insignificant to the others, but they are all worth celebrating, together or as a whole Homo Sapiens.

For the part on the anti-pathology, I realise microbs in the world are not just entitled to humans only. Microbs that harm animals are equally as potent as the humans one. As all are linked in the ecosystem. There is this theory on aggressive symbionant, that states that microbs jump species to affect another species so as to defend the symbiotic species by themselves. Just like how ants protect the trees from sloth. Likewise, I believe as humans clear more forests, there will be more nasty surprises for them. Just like the shocking HIV and Marburg Virus.

And now at police, it is not that I do not want to be mature, but in dealing with things, I have to, It is mandatory for me to be professional and mature. Though the word mature seems to haunt me from the "myjerk" incident.

May all be well. Very regretful of not attending college day, even when my teachers invite me. Got to work night shift. Alas, that is for the shift work life. I have weird off-days. My friends on weekends whereas I am in weekdays. Hai~~~. But I am going to watch star wars. May be the force with me, and to hell to the "Welcome to the dark side".

Though it seems that it is very hard to meet my friends together, I make it an effort. And also, hooray, I find my will to train my fitness. Hahah.. May all be well for me, and may the goodness be upon my friends and family. Thou shall value all friendships and kinships.

And a golden line that will never be removed forever in my brains "Thou can tolerate homosexual, but never to participate, be part of it and support it, no matter what happens..."

The new principles I have added. Soon, I am going to add the smoke one. As for the alcohol there will be come flexibilities. (It seem that I myself set laws for myself hahah, as long as they are good to me, do not harm others, why not?)

Bye blogs, MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU AND US !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The thinking of the thoughts ...

A rain has come, because Sky is disconcerted by the stupidity of the humans, whom were treated as a friend but did not appreciate anything. The humans has for many a time, make atrocious comments to Sky just because the humans saw the outside of the sky. For once, as the rain fell, the humans know that they do not know the sky enough. What sky pursue, all other skys of the other planets follow. And just because the sky pursue a better skies, this does not mean that that the sky is obsessed with the other skies. As the rain fell, drop by drop, onto the humans' skin, do they realise a terrible grave mistake. The world is big, of course, and with the endowment of intelligence, the humans are free to spread their opinions and thinkings. But the humans did not realise that sensitive is still sensitive. By speaking freely without consequences, blabbering nonsense, they have unleashed the forbidden words, and cause utter disturbing incidents to the sky and maybe to themselves. The humans have indeed always want to seek a better enlightenment, and maybe, the sky has always tolerated humans' nonsense. Now how can the humans claim that they can be more "enlightened". How can the humans claim that they are not back to their primitive states by stating laughable and stupid things. The rain fell because the sky still treat humans as a friend, as part of the world it owns. But the humans' action merely disintegrated what all was lost. The friendship and misunderstanding that may eventually disappear.

The humans are not comforted by the "rain" and thunderstorms brought by the sky. The humans have really spoken the nonsense and the wrongs. The humans should be blamed as they ask themselves have they ever treat the sky as a friend. The rain shows them. They have to understand. The humans should not have speak the blabber. It is totally wrong and horribly wrong. The humans admit that they direct to their sky, but what the humans meant are also for the other skies, or other potential narcisstic and skies who always love blue skies but not orange or grey sky. The humans then hereby apologise to the sky for their "primitive" action. Hoping that the rain will stop. Even then, the humans should not have blabber, thinking that as the world is an oyster, they can speak freely. In fact, with great powers come great responsibility. The humans should be more careful, cautious, than to speak the nonsense in the world. And also, the humans have wrong the sky and therefore must bow to the sky and to seek for forgiveness or even forgetfulness. Hopefully the sky can forgive the humans or at least forget. As the humans seek for "enlightenment", it is in the hope that their actions are the one that judge them the best. Enlightenment does not mean abusive primitive can be used. The humans still want the friendship, and do not want the friendship forged between the sky and the humanity to be lost. The humans want to let the sky know that, the words spoken is not enitrely directed to the sky. The humans promise the sky and others that love them, that taking note of the pen is mightier than the swords, the humans will be careful not to fall into pits. The humans promise the sky that they will be discerned.

The humans wish all the best for the sky, hoping for the sky to have a fruitful merger with another better sky and always to be nourished by sunshine. It is clear that the humans are awaiting the magnanimity of the sky. Hoping that the rain will stop. Hoping that sunshine will come, and the humans can go and sing with the sky together in some days. Hoping ......

P.S: I am busy, very busy, with so many going on with my life. SciFi, EciloP and a lot in my life. I sincerely must make myself a better person, do not alienate friends and make enemies or whatever. I finally get to escort "someone", who give me trouble by keep on spitting. He is an I.I. Darn it, I scolded him for the first time, if he met my earlier version, or when I was in Sec 3, hell, I will have beaten him up. He want to flee, I can see from his eyes. Grab hold of him tightly and he give me the "eye". All the gangsters should know what this mean, as this is very common for gang-fights, affray and rioting. But I control myself, restrain him and put him back. The last thing I want is to get an undeserved charge for hurting someone by physical injuries. Now still waiting for the NUS reply. Feel a little bit disconsolate and woebegone now. Hai~~....... Seriously, the route to enlightenment and mature have changed too. I am now even further away than I thought ...

Bye blogs, once again, from now on, I will be very discern,very careful, and do not think too much craps, as the route to enlightenment awaits me.

The thinking ...

All the entries I am going to input are going to be short due to my lack of time. I am very busy now, with so many policeman affair. Busy tending to many cases, writing reports, in services, life is like work and work, services and services to me. This is why I am going to plan meaningfully, to do my exercise, train my fitness and at the same time, try to spend some time with my family and friends. Here are some of the principles that I have encrypted and thou shall abide all these throughout my life.

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My PRINCIPLES, AIMS AND CHARACTERS

THE 5 THOUS …

Thou shall be the greatest (witty and courageous) Duelist of all.

Thou shall be RAFT (Resilient, adventurous, flexible thinker) who balance well.

Thou shall value friendships and kinships.

Thou shall be a GCUL (Great, compassionate, understanding leader.

Thou shall have a moral and ethnical principle.

NIRVANA THOU: RESPECT TO ALL THOU SHALL BE

Motto: Thou shall be a better person …

Added: Thou shall be a competent and great person !

The sayings:

When the ship reach the harbour, the ship will go straight.

God only bless those people who help themselves. (God may refer to all the "Gods", luck and probability that favours all)

Do not wait for the change to occur, let the change awaits you.

Consistency is professional.

Constant vigilance !!! Bodes well and protect me.

Assumptions are the mother of all fuck-ups.

A person without a dream is a zombie, a person without a plan will always be lost.

If you do not change, you will die like a dinosaur. If you change too much,you will become a dangerous unstable radicle.

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Above are some of the sayings. All these I have amassed and decided upon from the short 18 years of my life. Of course, I will add and change for the better, as promised.

Some reflections on the Amazing race, the Apprentice and the Eye for a guy 2.

I am simply glad that the "old" couple, the Blacks, won the race. Right from the beginning, I have already got the faith in them.They really deserved every bit of the 1 million dollars. Even when they are reduced t begging, their unity moved me. Plus their motive of getting the money is noble, that is to try to give birth to a child even when that woman is 44 years old, right over the optimum menstrual age. And for their aim, they made many girls ashamed nowadays. Some girls I know always like to look for good-looking guys here or they, or they made stupid promises like maybe they are going to remain single in their life. Though these are their personal decisions and I have no rights to coerce them, these girls simply are too materialistically exuberant, or focus too much on outer looks. Though I do not have a soulmate now, I firmly believe I am going to find one, and that girl is going to be my wife and I am going to spend my entire life with her. I pray hard I can find the true one. I like what Ronald Regaan the former American president said. "Those people who say that there are no heroes in this age are horribly wrong, they just don't know where to find." Likewise, in terms of soulmates, people just don't know where to find nowadays. Maybe I am one of them, but I am going to push myself away from this category.

As for that unscrupulous guy, I know that he can get into the final but definitely cannot win the game. All bad people seem to achieve something in the end, but will never get the ultimate happiness and gift. This is so true to the case, as it exhibits. A warning to all future Lex Luthor, be careful of aiming to do great things but not good things. As for the third team, they are simply disunited and it is a wonder that why they can stay in the finals.

As for the apprentice, doing business is always a screw-up. It is how a good manager knows how to turn screw-ups into a good one that makes a good manager. But to be a good CEO or businessman, you will have to be like Donald Trump, to have foresight, charisma, courage and a little bit of luck. Nonetheless, I still think that Kerry the guy in the final to win the girl in the final round. I am not a male chauvinist and I may be wrong. But I think Kerry has a higher calibre in terms of leadership and knowing what is supposed to be done. That girl lacks this imperative aspect. And it is also a wonder why she can enter the finals. Anyway, good luck to both of them.

For the eye for a guy 2, at first I am absoultely disgusted by the fact that people nowadays treat relationships like a game, romance like a toy and pursuing as a common thing. I may be conservative but I do have some rooms for openess. That girl may have all the things the guys want, but hey I think for me I may be too lousy for her.(Haha, not bringing down myself but actually feel relieved) I may have no rights to comment on all these things. But hey, I just don't like the way, people treat love like dust. I may have sound too harsh or heavy, but I do not care. Those poor handsome chaps in the show, I believe they can find a good soulmate. The show is actually indirectly exploiting and teaching everyone to be jealous and envy in love. All these 2 may be inevitable, but hey the media is glorifying all these acts and feelings that are negative to everyone. It also serves to satisfy all the "Apparenter", that is all the people who only prefer the apparent desire characteristics. People should judge love as a holy thing, not a sting of envy, jealousy and competition. Frankly all these are only me opinions and I am not a Christians. But please do not give acrimonious comments to me though I will welcome all comments. May the thoughts be with me ...

My blog is like diary, and does not mean to offend anyone or anything. These are all just comments, my comment. Onlookers please do not be livid if I have stepped anyone's tail. The recent blog scare has truly scared me.(Read newspaper on the blog issues) Of course the racist statements are too much. But for the A*Stars incident, I do not know. Shhh..... Or they are going to sue me too .... (Too skeptical of me) But if anyone is unhappy, feel free to comment and I shall do my best to appease all, but not compromising my lustre and integrity of my diaryisblog principle.

Bye, blog, again, Arigo Paras Slempre

My Future ...

Finally, I am going to make a decision in my life and I have made it. NTU Biomolecular and Chemical engineering and NUS faculty of Science has accepted me. After pondering, I have decided to go into Life Science and that is to choose NUS faculty of Science. I have chosen definitely and I will never have regrets. Though I will sincerely want a Biomed and TCM, which is also my passion. That is Knowledge + Using both western and Chinese medicine. But, well, my grades aren't that good, so, I do not have that priviledge.

Never mind. I have decided to go into Microbiologist via Virologist. At the same time, I believe I can manage the SciFi well, hopefully making it the biggest and the greatest. I believe there are 3 aspects of health.

- 1st, it is the emotional and mental health.

- 2nd, it is the physical health.

- 3rd, it is the anti-pathologist.

The 1st is about EQ, AQ and maybe basic IQ. The emotional aspect on how to handle stress. The mental health on how resilent a person's mind can be.

The 2nd is about the physical fitness. How we train ourselves. Doing PHYSICAL TRAINING. Training our stamina, our fitness. This in scientific term can in fact prevent muscle atrophy. Allow our organs to be trained up too.

The 3rd is about dealing with every single harmful organisms to the humans. This is the anti-pathology. Eradicating the devastating prototista, bacteria, virus and even the prions.

All the 3 aspects have the doctors. But without research and understanding, then there can be no efficient doctors.

The 1st 2 is exceptionally important. But without the 3rd, even the world's healthiest people can fall sick and die terribly. Thus, it is essential that we should know about the microbs in the world. How we can prevent them, know more about them, and maybe find ways on how they are so related to us, how they are linked to us as everything in the world is linked in the biosphere of eco-system.

Well, this is a special thought done by me, my life.

And also, for my job now, really learn a lot. But I still got a lot more to learn. Meeting all walks of life, dealing with cases. Well, I am definitely going to become "a professional mature boy" ...

Arigo Paras Selmpre !!! My log, my blog, my diary ...

My posting out

This is going to be the shortest entry I am going to put into this blog. Basically this week, has been rather a roller-coaster. First of all, after posting to 'J' Division at Jurong East, preparing myself for the SSO (Sentry) post, I got news that I can or may be transferred to other posts. Of course, not wanting Staff Assistant job which is super rot, I want NPCO, that is the real policeman that patrol the neighbourhood. In the end, ..... Pardon me for not saying the whole thing as this is very sensitive. A lot of people can see and know but all these should be kept secrets. So, I just write this to remind me to reminisce what I learn. So, pardon me.

Frankly, I will like to speak the whole truth, but too bad, there are too many sensitive information, both formal and informal. Whether it is my friend's incident or mine or N.S. Realise I have to limit my entries. Of course, that does not mean that I am not going to input good diary, as diary is blog. My purpose(Oe of it) is to write diary, and allow people to learn from my mistakes.

For SciFi thing, everything is not that smooth for now. As we hold meetings, and identify and think, thou sincerely hope that great creative juice can flow out of me.

Arigo Para Slempre as usual. I gain a lot from my experiences. Realise that I see the truth in Singapore. Cannot be too innocent from now. I am a policeman now, and for this 2 years, whether I like it or not. No temptations and no childish. I am going to be mature if I am going to be a good policeman. I have to deal things now in a professional way, not trying to give myself stress.

Bye, blog ...

P.S: Purposely write nebulous account, as many things cannot be revealed ....